2 centimeters too close and light years away from understanding

Opera house in Buenos Aires, Argentina

For those of you who have been around for a while  might be familiarized with my story by now.

Starting when I was sixteen years old I had the balls to move away from home, and unlike most youth I landed much further away from my parent’s nest than anyone had anticipated. To be precise: where I landed was a humid and corrupted city under the south equator, namned Buenos Aires, and a long way from my small housing called Scandinavia.

This was about eighteen months ago, and as you all know things tend to change when time floats by. Today I stumbled upon various of documents directly related to my own life; one in the shape of a recommendation letter from a teacher, one being a long letter I wrote to my best friend during my first week away and the second document being a folder containing photos summarizing three and a half month of my life.

It is and will always be problematic to observe things changing in front of you; may it be in the form of revolutions, weight losses or simply personal enlightenment. No matter what you will always feel like being two centimeters too close to understand; like observing a piece of art in a gallery. To compare the letter of sixteen year old me addressing worries such as remaining shy in a boarding school a million miles away, not sleeping enough and the sense of being light years away from understanding what the teachers were arguing about in class, contrasted to this year’s recommendation letter, was more than absurd.

I cannot stress how happy I am to have stumbled upon these documents and realizing what different curves life and people can take. Though I do not want to admit that I have changed significantly I cannot deny that certain aspects of me have become slightly more sharpened and bent than before. Being away several months in a strict boarding school in India and lost in Japan will most likely have the same effect on me, I can sense it already.

Maybe a year from now I will find a folder and two different letters, and think of how much has become different since today.

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